a puzzle nearly complete

It's more amazing than I can put into words what it's like to watch a plan unfold. A plan that I had no hand in. A plan that wasn't executed the way I would have had it, if given the pen and paper to write it out. A plan that blesses abundantly more. More than me. A plan that blesses my family as a whole.

I've shared my woes about sitting on a house for two and a half years. When asked, I have shared, and sometimes I was compelled to share even when I wasn't asked. Unfortunately, we all complain and have our moments of doubt. Last fall, however, I gave my house to God. He can carry what I can't. He never tires and I do. This winter, I began tithing like never before. I have been faithful to give the Lord His 10% off the top of every paycheck. It was risky; we were barely squeaking by, but I've learned that if I give Him what's His, He will give me exceedingly more. And He has.

Without divulging information that is not mine to share in a public space, certain things in certain people's lives had to fall into place before my house could bless the people it's supposed to. A ball that was set in motion years before I ever moved and put my house on the market has finally come to a stop. The life that my brother would have never chosen for himself is one of the pieces that brings our puzzle near completion. It really is nothing short of His amazing grace on our lives ... the doors that unexpectedly open when the world has slammed them shut ... the family that refuses to be pushed down by adversity ... these are things that only He can make provisions for. To Him, my provider, I am eternally faithful.

get a grip, right?

I should be working right now.

But today's one of those days where I feel like I've taken a mis-step that I didn't know I took. Like, "can I get a do-over?" or wanting to back-pedal to try to figure out what happened. Feels like someone pulled the floor out from under me and I'm falling. You know that stomach-in-your-throat feeling, right?

Pray for me. Pray a lot.

learning as i go

As a follow-up to my very personal admission the other day, I have been seriously downing some water (4 to 6 litres each day), which in turn has kicked my caffeine out of the way. I've had a 20 oz. coffee each morning, another jolt at lunch, and that's pretty much it. No extra snacking (not that I did that much anyway), and I've been smarter about my meal choices.

Sadly, Billy and I have not connected in the past few days. Yes, my priorities are mixed up. There has been good TV on at night and so I've avoided turning on the DVD player.

Today was not a good day for me, however. I worked from home and that makes snacking a much more convenient temptation. Between my son bringing me Easter candy from his basket and spotting a nearby can of peanuts, I feel like I ate all day long. I'm glad for it, as strange as that sounds, because now I'm miserable. That reinforces the need and desire to cut back. It's a good reminder not to behave tomorrow as I did today.

Learning as I go,
Casey

Image: Ice Water. 4/9/10 from my 365 project.

bubble wish

"I wanna get in the bubble, Mama," Jackson said to me without looking up from dipping his wand into the bottle.

I stopped and thought about that before finally having to ask, "Why do you want to get in the bubble?" I was so disappointed that he couldn't articulate a reason. He's almost three and still short on words.

I've been thinking about his bubble wish all day. What a precious notion, to somehow get caught in a bubble and float away. I love his amazing little mind and sweet, sweet heart.

i'm about to tell you something

... something personal. Deeply personal. If you're close to me, it's nothing you don't already know. For the rest, I'm coming clean, and I'm asking all of you for help.

I love food. Just getting a taste of something isn't enough for me. If it's something that I enjoy, I want to eat as much of it as I possibly can. That's a gross thought, I know. It's gross for me to think about and even tell you about. So why am I?

I'm past the point of being disgusted with myself. "So exercise!," you say. Easier said than done. Not to make excuses, although they are valid, I have a 20 minute commute to work, sit at a desk for eight hours, go home, consider cooking dinner and inevitably end up going a microwave, oven (and I mean dinner-in-a-box), or order-out route. I help my daughter with her homework and try to keep my son occupied away from her so that she can actually work. Their bed time is 8:30, but most nights they're 9 or 9:15 actually making it to bed. By the time they're in bed, I'm absolutely exhausted and can barely keep my eyes open. So there. No time for exercise.

"So make wiser food choices!," you say. Ah. That's perhaps my biggest problem of all. I just can't seem to. I don't want to point a finger at my family and say I was raised on good Southern food (y'all know that equals lots of butter and grease, right?), but that's not exactly true, except on holidays. Which I live(d) for. Stuffing, mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese ... and NOT in moderation. Not to change the subject, but my husband has a problem with this, too, and often creates a bad food environment because of it. He can make the most awesome macaroni and cheese you could ever have in your life. I'm talking like two pounds of cheese!

Back to the point, my mom didn't cook poorly (like I do when I cook), but we ate out a lot. We were a busy family just like my own family is now. And we enjoyed eating out. And we ordered the awful stuff that we didn't really know was awful ... like Chili's Buffalo Chicken Ranch Sandwich recently shown on the Today Show to be the worst (health-wise, but tastes real good!) chicken sandwich. I'd rather not tell you how many times I've eaten that sandwich now that I know it "has as many calories as in 7 scoops of Haagen-Dazs Five Vanilla Bean ice cream."

I don't believe there is a "fat gene". I do believe we all have vastly different metabolism rates, and I've figured out that mine is slow. I've read that one can increase their metabolism; apparently I need to re-read how that's done. I have little to no will-power. Luckily, I don't have much of a sweet tooth, and I do like water. Those are certainly pluses.

As I'm making this a public confession for the first time ever, I think I can set some goals and actually have a chance of sticking to them. Some of you will no doubt enjoy holding me accountable!

Working Towards a Healthy Lifestyle
I solemnly vow to myself to do the following:
1. Limit caffeine beverages to no more than one 16 oz. serving per day.
2. Park my car farther away from the elevator in the parking deck.
3. Begin taking the stairs from the parking deck to the lobby.
4. Include at least one fruit and one vegetable with dinner each night.
5. Opt for cereal instead of a breakfast sandwich (or leftover pizza) each morning.
6. Keep a glass of water at my desk to sip on throughout the day.
7. Go for a walk with the kids at least three nights each week.
8. Pop that Billy Blanks DVD in again, and actually do the tae bo at least three times each week.
9. Look in the mirror more often to be disgusted and keep up the motivation.
10. Find a way to get buy-in from my husband (aka getting him to eat healthier, too).

Can I get some support? Anyone want to be an accountability partner? I've put this out here for the world to see, so won't some of you promise to check up on me and remind me of how ashamed I am of my appearance at this moment? I need you.

Image Courtesy http://www.southernplate.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/baked-macaroni-and-cheese.jpg.

i dare you

I dare you to take the 365 challenge with me.

Commit to capturing one great photo every day for 365 days. Post them to http://www.365project.org/ to share with the world. I am, and I'm loving it so far! 

This junked truck sits alongside an old logging road on private property in Rockbridge County, Virginia. I saturated it to make the colors pop. It's my favorite so far.

See my shots at http://365project.org/chiggins/365.

our daily blessings

I recently found a website that encouraged Christians to journal their daily blessings. I've taken this on and you can read mine via the link to the right called "overflowing heart". I encourage you to also take a moment each day to write one thing you're thankful for - your daily blessing.

Something I didn't note on that page (yet) is how I'm blessed to have great Christian examples in my life. From my pastors to my small group, and new friends along the way, God is sending influential people my way to grow me. I'd like to introduce you to one new friend who blogs about her life as a single mom of twin girls, worship leader, how she's doing in her walk with Christ, and what it's like to be a "crazy redhead". Please see a clip below of her singing a soulful rendition of "Nothing But the Blood of Jesus". What an awesome tribute to our Lord and Savior. Be blessed.

distracted in life

When I go to work, I can't concentrate on getting and staying caught up. When I'm at home, my attention is not on housework or feeding my kids (only barely). When I'm supposed to be spending time in the Word, I am pulled away to something else.

Lately I've been praying for a clear mind and the ability to focus on the tasks at hand. I believe that jumping those hurdles will allow me to better glorify God and bring harmony to my life. We should all strive to consider His will first, others second, and ourselves last.

But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. -Philippians 3:7

I'm reading a new book that my husband gave me for my birthday. Priscilla Shirer's Discerning the Voice of God: How to Recognize When God Speaks is right in line with SQuire Rushnell's When God Winks at You: How God Speaks Directly to You Through the Power of Coincidence that I read a while ago, which is refreshing, since they validate one another. Oftentimes what we think of as mere coincidence is not coincidence at all. I'm elated to tell you that I have heard the voice of God and was completely able to discern it.

A while ago my daily devotion action item was to seek God in prayer and ask Him to show me His will for my life. In that prayer time he clearly showed me a word. Literally, the word "TEACH" came into my mind. And literally, I said, "no, God, I don't want to teach." (NOTE: Don't say "no" to God) If you obey His command, you can do more than you ever imagined you could.

So am I teaching now? Well, not in the "school teacher" kind of way, but the day after He gave me my orders, He opened a door for me to teach, yes. I am now leading my small group (notice I didn't say that I'm teaching my small group ... ALL of them have been Christians far longer than I, and some know the Bible like the back of their hand). I feel God using me, however. I'm growing by leaps and bounds because I am now held accountable to know my stuff as I lead discussions. It's amazing.

I think I got off topic a little, but what I really wanted to do tonight is share an excerpt of Priscilla Shirer's Discerning. She hit the nail on the head when she wrote ...

"I begin my quiet time, but then the phone rings and I answer. Satan cheers.
I wait until the end of the day to listen to God, but then find myself too tired to stretch my spiritual earlobes. Satan applauds.
In the stillness of the morning, I lean my elbows on heaven's windowsill to commune with the Lord, but then I decide to read my e-mail first. Satan laughs."

Just as I told a friend to never let anyone own her emotions, I'm telling you to never let Satan ruin your time with God. Be diligent in giving Him your time and He will give you so much more.